Profit Peelers is a new ad network that specializes in those “peel away” ads you see in the top right corner of some websites. The ad style is somewhat interesting, which is why I got sucked into this, but it turns out that Profit Peelers is a big joke.

All it amounts to is the peel away ads script running on their server instead of yours. It uses their ads and infrastructure so you can get the peeling ads on your site without buying the script (in exchange for losing out on a chunk of your ad revenue.)

It actually sounds good until you go in and look at their offers. The offers are from Maxbounty and other ad networks, so Profit Peelers acts as yet another middleman between you and the actual merchant. It reminds me of the AuctionAds formula (lots of eBay affiliates banding together looking for a higher commission %), except that in this case, there is no such incentive for increased performance. And if there is, Profit Peelers reaps all the benefits.

It gets worse… a lot of the offers are expired. These CPA campaigns only last so long and then they need updated. Well, I don’t think Profit Peelers has been updated since August 2007. Now the Profit Peelers links go to either 404 pages or unrelated offers.

For example, here’s a Free PSP offer.

(Click image for a larger view.)

If you look closely, you’ll see that a user has commented how the offer expired a month ago, but it’s still listed. Way to take care of your publishers!

The next screenshot is the landing page… yep, a Visa gift card page. Definitely not a PSP page.

Stay clear of this one.

However, the PeelAwayAds script itself does seem interesting. It might be worth a shot for the $27 it costs. (It’s a neat script, not some get-rich-quick crap.) I haven’t used it yet, but if I do, I’ll tell you the level of “suckiness” I find.

The only problem I see is that you’ll have to have some good graphic design skills to create appealing ads (no pun intended!) But doing anything right does require extra work and money, so that’s just something you have to live with.

So if you do jump on the bandwagon, you can get Peel Away Ads right here for $27 through my affiliate link, or search Google because I’ve seen it listed for $17. I’m not sure what those people are doing that they can sell it for $17, but whatever.

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Since I went ahead and did a recap of some of the stuff that sucked in 2007, I might as well write my predictions for 2008:

1. John Chow will quit blogging.

Long-time JohnChow.com readers will remember a time when he was the only author and most of the content on his blog was insightful (albeit evil) advice for making money online. At that time, it was a great blog. Recently, however, it seems that the blog is ruled by guest authors - even the $450 ReviewMe reviews are outsourced. (If I wanted to read stuff from n00bs, I’d surf around on blogspot.)

Unfortunately, I think this trend will continue through 2008. John Chow will post less and less until even his dinner party posts are written by someone else. (Good for him, though, because he established a business where he makes $20k per month with what is mostly user-generated content. And unlike Myspace, it’s not a lurking spot for sexual predators.)

2. ProBlogger.net will get moved to AverageBlogger.net

In a move similar to what’s happening to JohnChow.com, ProBlogger.net will get overrun with guest authors who post the same rehashed information that I’ve read countless times (or just plain common sense stuff.)

This will force the FCC to intervene and enforce international categorization laws which will understandably demote ProBlogger down to AverageBlogger level. (Let’s just hope it stays above n00b-blogger.net.)

3. Google will make tons of money.

While the majority of bloggers will continue to talk about how much they hate Google due to paid link debates, SERPs fluctuations, or monopolization, it won’t matter. Google will make tons of money, as usual, and laugh about it all the way to the bank.

That’s because all this useless drivel about Google being unfair just reinforces Google’s position as a big business which won’t be challenged by these webmasters who have no business sense. (Google not cracking down on paid links would be like a supermarket owner saying “hello shoplifter, please come in and steal my stuff! I welcome you into my store!”)

4. Shoemoney fights Chuck Liddell

Shoemoney has been posting plenty of UFC stuff on his blog, and this year he’s going all out with the launch of Fighters.com (a social network and other cool stuff for the mixed martial arts community.)

Well, what better publicity stunt for bringing together UFC fans and internet marketers than a charity event where Shoemoney goes in the octagon with Chuck Liddell? Shoe can skip the triathlon this year and focus on the fight. He might as well, I mean, it worked out fine for Rocky Balboa and Hulk Hogan…

5. ZacJohnson.com will take over as the most useful ‘make money online’ blog.

While John Chow’s website will still be popular and attract tons of loyal followers in 2008, people that want to learn something (instead of suck up to someone) will gravitate towards Zac Johnson’s super affiliate blog.

Why? First, he has enough initial publicity and name recognition that he’s believable. Second, he has the fancy blog theme. Third, he writes a lot of useful guides as well as useful tips and tricks. Fourth, he might just be Spiderman.

Believe it or not, those five things will happen in 2008.

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You know the little 16×16 favicon images you put on your website? They’re ok, and you have to do one for each site, but they don’t really stand out.

Now, thanks to a new thing called BlogIcon, you can add an 80×80 image to your blog that’s like an avatar that follows you around.

“Like a favicon but bigger” you could say.

You might be thinking, “wait, can’t you do this with MyBlogLog or Gravatar?” The answer is yes, but then you have to waste time signing-up for those stupid services. With BlogIcon, you just upload an image to your site. That’s it!

If you want to learn more or see some examples, take a look at this post at BlogStorm.

But the point of this post is to say that BlogIcon is now installed right here on InternetMarketingSucks, so add a BlogIcon to your blog and it will show up with each comment you make!

(Please add a blogicon on your blog and leave a comment here so we can see how it looks!)

*Update* Apparently there is no longer support for BlogIcon. And it doesn’t work with Wordpress 2.5 or newer. So avoid BlogIcon, it’s a waste of time.

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Want to know the fastest way to elevate yourself to guru status? It’s all in the 3D ebook cover. Fake testimonials endorsing you is a close second, but putting your name on a 3D ebook cover (even if you don’t have an actual ebook) is super fast and practically guarantees that you’ll be taken seriously.

Now, after years of needing some graphic design skills, you can make your own 3D ebook cover, totally free. No expensive software, logo designers, or Photoshop skills required! It’s all online in a new Web 2.0 style web app called 3D-Pack.com.

You just upload some flat images and it makes a 3D box you can download. It’s simple enough that any non-guru can use it. I actually used this for a fake software cover in an older blog post which makes a fine example.

Best of all, there are three styles to choose from, so if you want to sell a fake CD-ROM, there’s a graphic for you too.

Just take a look at these serious covers in the gallery:

OK, OK, those were cheesy. This is about the best I could find:

And the rest were porn:

NSFW box 1
NSFW box 2
NSFW box 3
Just Plain Nasty

But whatever you’re selling, now you can be cool and get rich quick just like the gurus! The 3D cover is essential to obtaining guru status, so the sooner you use it, the better.

[2008 update - it looks like they removed the stupid, cheesy ebook covers I was linking to!]

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