Warning: If you don't understand sarcasm and satire, you might as well leave right now.

Get Rich Quick Someday

 

Sign-up below to get a free copy of my The One Secret The Gurus Don't Want You To Know ebook!

 

Subscribe and Get Updates

rss subscribe button

Subscribe to get updates whenever this blog is updated!

small rss button Via RSS

email envelope Via Email

* You'll only get emails when new content is posted. No spam here.

fakeburner chicklet

13
Nov

Your Ad Titles Make Great Pick-Up Lines

Ever had trouble explaining your job to friends and acquaintances?

It’s easy for spammers, because everyone can relate to getting screwed over by them, whether it’s a casual email user or a professional blogger. But if you are using affiliate programs and doing PPC marketing, things can be a little more complicated.

So you have to put PPC affiliate marketing into terms that the general population can understand. Just like this

  • Your keywords get you to the bar. They let you mingle, and circulate around the room. They allow you to see and be seen, where the people are.
  • Your ads are your pickup line. It’s your introduction. Your chance to make a first impression, and to create an action.
  • Your landing page seals the deal. It gets the number. It takes the person home. Whatever you consider a successful pick up.

That’s a great strategy, although with most things in business, you need to adapt it to your needs, put in some hard work, and think outside the box. (Or at least have a Web 2.0 style logo.)

[Warning: Only 18+ readers should be reading anything about bars and girls.]

So here is my plan:

  1. Do keyword research for stuff that girls like.
  2. Browse Google for these keywords, keeping a close eye on the headlines used in the PPC ads.
  3. Go to the bar, and repeat some of these “call to action” phrases whenever I see a cute girl.
  4. When they get intrigued, win them over with some benefits from the landing page.

My first attempt went like this:

  1. Searched for what girls like, and I found HowToDoGirls, and one story was about sex and the company picnic.
  2. Googled for “company picnic” and found an ad for Philip & Henry magic show productions.
  3. Tried to pick up some girls with “Want my illusion to jazz up your party?”
  4. Got slapped because my drunken, slurred words came out as “Want to lose jizz when farty?”

I think that was a little too forward…

It’s OK though, because picking up girls at the bar is all about testing. Next time I’ll just try “Want 30 minutes of high-energy entertainment with me?” or “My tricks in bed make everyone laugh!” :D

small rss button Want a good laugh every day? Then simply subscribe to our RSS feed.
email envelope Or subscribe via email.

nice cold beer

Click here to buy me a beer, because damn, I need to get drunk to forget how much internet marketing sucks!


14 Comments so far... but what do you think?

  1. david on November 13th, 2007

    Don’t get drunk, easy as that!

  2. Max Powers on November 13th, 2007

    Wow! An audible laugh when reading a blog! I commonly smile quietly to myself, but this was good!

  3. Michael on November 18th, 2007

    Funny every time I am at a bar and I tell people that I work for a company called called big man’s land, noone thinks common sense (plus size clothing store) but rather oh an adult store or a buffet restaurant/sports bar.). Perception at a bar always changes. Thanks for making me laugh on a Sunday night.

  4. Marc Klein on November 19th, 2007

    Great post. Will visit here more often. Thanks for the info.

  5. Jason Pearson on March 24th, 2008

    Can’t really relate to this post–happily married, but it sure was entertaining!

  6. debt management service on June 17th, 2008

    I agree internet marketing sucks lol… Great post, guess not to successful picking up girls your way ;-)

  7. dr noel aguilar on June 17th, 2008

    Nice blog you have here. Seems like you are a marketing pro ;-)

  8. Sucker on June 17th, 2008

    “Seems like you are a marketing pro”

    Yeah, I use that as another one of my pick-up lines ;)

  9. bucalo on June 18th, 2008

    He is a pro for sure lol. Master of words ;-)

  10. small business crm on June 18th, 2008

    I have been reading your blog for some time now. Really like your humor lol

  11. seo services thailand on June 21st, 2008

    The pickup line is what makes a post or offer baity.. You want the people to click your link so what you need is getting people interested..

  12. Internet Marketing on August 29th, 2008

    Lol…. some brainy writings there. Nice one and it makes my day a brighter one. – Rif Chia

  13. money on December 19th, 2008

    great post. You provide many tips about using affiliate programs and doing PPC marketing.

  14. Wii Accessories on February 12th, 2009

    Haha… hilarious analogy.

Leave a reply

Anti-Spam Protection by WP-SpamFree

Close
E-mail It